Way back when

I decided to write again after making a new friend online that asked me about my "coming out"- Wow. Talk about a blast from the past! That is one thing I do not often think about for various reasons, it was long ago, its in the past now.
Still, I dont mind telling this "story" now. See, there was a big difference being gay back then, then being gay now.
As human beings we often take things for granted, our freedom, rights, and guarantees as legal citizens are included there.

I grew up in South America, in different places there, but mostly in Bolivia. I dont remember ever NOT being gay, since I was a kid I knew I liked men more than women and even though my first sexual experience was with a woman, I knew I preferred men.
Ok, so far no biggie, except these things, back then WERE a biggie. We were to not ever talk aobut gay- gay was wrong, gay was sick, gay was, well, everything bad and disgusting in the world.

Where I come from, we do not discuss these things- even now. So when I came out to my mother, well, its pretty safe to say all hell broke loose. On her part at least.
I felt like I had gotten rid of an enormous burden. She, I am sure, felt exactly the opposite.
As is the case with some of us, this news was not welcome in my family. I was cut off, money was not given to me anymore, I had to get a job! My first job! I moved in with my then boyfiend which I am sure was NOT what my mother expected. And we lived happily together for around 3 and a half years.
We told everyone we were friends sharing a house. The locals believed it. His coworkers knew we were a gay couple.
I think we were a happy couple because there was nothing intefering with our relationship. There was barely one gay bar, a seedy one if that. No clubs, no saunas, so there was no way of meeting other guys. Hence the good relationship.
I knew there was a whole lot of gay in the world, but in Bolivia, in those days, it was all underground.
When we travelled, I could see more of gay , clubs, bars, restaurants, even saunas. Places where one was not only welcome but wanted at! Upon returning to Bolivia I could see those differences and realize that nothing would change there so when I got my chance to leave, I did so in a hurry!
I am sure that my personal family experience when coming out is nothing out of the ordinary in a latin country. We have very catholic backgrounds and a lot of ignorance there, so if that means sacrificing a son or daughter, so be it.
Their ignorant values remain.
Eventually, my mother came around, It took her a while, a lot of tears were shed, but she saw where I lived, met my partner and we are friends again.
So you see, now that years have gone by, now that we can safely say that there is something gay almost everywhere in the world. When I remember the past, I can tell you it was not always like this. I live in a country where same sex couples can marry (or almost) thats amazing! There are a lot of countries where one can do that now, even VERY catholic Spain!
And considering that as a gay man you can be beat up in the street in any latin country. I'd say we've come a long way.
Does this make me a believer in Gay pride? Hell yeah!
We all put our two cents in I think, by not staying in the closet, by listening to the music we do, by supporting Madonna, by wearing loud pink, you name it, the gayer we've been the better chance things have to change one day. For one simple reason:
NO ONE should tell us who to love or care for, no one should influence what you feel and no one should repress your sexuality in any way!